Confessions of a Conservative Atheist
The world’s only one man media empire
Conceived and built in a lab by engineers using slide rules and tee squares, I was launched on a rocket, leveraged another rocket to shoot me into space, swept past Jupiter and Saturn, and then exited the Solar System across a career longer than my human creators. I am Voyager 1 and I have traveled… Continue reading I am Voyager 1 and I have traveled beyond the Solar System, further than any object made by human hands
If Henry V survived, he would have been king of both England and France, forging one of the most powerful, if not the most powerful country on Earth at the time. After I killed him however, a slow, agonizing death, not suited for a warrior, the world was changed forever. I am an amoeba and… Continue reading I am a lowly amoeba and I just killed the most powerful man in the world, changing all of history in the process
Though the scientific establishment doesn’t yet know my name, I have produced four papers that will fundamentally alter our understanding of reality for more than a century, resulting in a period unequaled in all of science. I am Albert Einstein at the end of 1905, what is known as the miracle year in science, the… Continue reading I am Albert Einstein at the end of 1905, what is known as the miracle year in science, the “annus mirabilis”
Whether you have heard of Caenorhabditis elegans, your own body and mind work much the same way. Essentially, your brain is C elegans’ times 331,125,828 or so, having neurons that look both inward and outward, reflecting even upon themselves over and over and over again. I am one of those neurons. I am a neuron… Continue reading I am a neuron in the human brain, almost the same as that found in a lowly roundworm
I am part creation of modern science, part living legend, having not walked the Earth for more than 10,000 years. I also pose an interesting biological question, one scientists have been debating for years and one which has no clear answer... I am a dire wolf, newly born into this world. I am part creation… Continue reading I am a dire wolf, newly born into this world, or am I?
Like a human with two sides to their personality, the classic Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, I behave like a wave in some cases, for example, when I am cruising across the universe, and like a solid object in others, literally a tiny, massless ball of light known as a photon. I am a beam… Continue reading I am a beam of light traveling from a distant star
It’s the year 1600 and I am already an accomplished playwright, having written plays and created characters like Romeo and Juliet that would be revered for centuries. This might have been enough for any other artist, but I am not any artist by any means. I am William Shakespeare about to write Hamlet. It’s the… Continue reading I am William Shakespeare about to write Hamlet
I am a stranger to humanity, but you live your lives upon my brothers, loving, hating, caring, killing, birthing, burying, and everything else you do only because we are solid enough to build upon and in many cases, build from. If we were like you, there would be no humanity in the first place. I… Continue reading I am a rock on the Galapagos Archipelago, being a fictionalized account told from the perspective of the volcanic remnant itself
Though I am undoubtedly an insect, I do not inspire the same fear and revulsion as many of my cousins, unless I am infected with the horsehair worm. Then, my appearance is grotesque, the stuff of nightmares, and my suicidal behavior even more so. I am a zombie cricket about to drown myself so the… Continue reading I am a zombie cricket about to drown myself so the parasite I carry can reproduce, being a fictionalized account as told from the perspective of the doomed cricket
Soaring at an altitude of around 1,000 feet, I can survey a dominion in detail spanning over three square miles and am able to spot a rabbit moving a full mile away. I usually hunt fish, however, and I can see them swimming, even under the water from several hundred feet above before I strike. … Continue reading I am an eagle on the wing, being a fictionalized account of a hunting raptor told from the perspective of the raptor itself
Confessions of a Conservative Atheist 